XCII – Have I Ever…?

Though my blog title says rants, I sometimes like to veer off a little and do something different. I’m kinda weird that way. I think just being angry and raving all the time is quite boring. As a country song once stated, “I don’t know why you’ve gotta be angry all the time.” So, let’s do something a little on the fun side.

I found a kind of party game of “have you ever” questions. There are kinda serious ones, dirty ones and funny ones. I’ll answer some of the first list. There are like 35 online, but I’m not gonna go that far (not right now, anyway). I’ll answer just selected ones. Well, here goes: Have you ever…?

…broken a bone? Yes, indeed. I was returning home from school in the 11th grade, and a car leaving a stop sign struck me and my bike. My leg was broken, and I spent the next couple of months in a cast. I missed quite a bit of school, and almost didn’t graduate because of it😱 (I went quite into detail about that two weeks ago).

…been on the radio or TV? My 15 seconds of fame: I’ve made a brief appearance on the radio a couple of times. I managed to get through once years ago on Art Bell’s show during open lines night. That was kinda cool. I also called and got through once on Tim Conway, Jr’s show on KFI radio in Los Angeles one night.

car radio

…talked on the phone for more than two hours? Aw, hell no! The only time I’m ever on the phone for any protracted length of time is when I’m on hold. Otherwise, my calls are usually less than a minute. Do you really think anyone wants to hold a conversation with this introvert?

countdown

…had a friend who shared your same birthday? First of all, what’s a friend? Seriously, though, I don’t really know anyone born the same date as me. Michael Keaton and Freddie Mercury share my birthdate, but they’re celebrities, and I’m just me.

mercury

keaton

…had a near-death experience? Nope, can’t say I have.

…sung karaoke? Are you kidding me? I refuse to embarrass myself like that. One time at a work Christmas party (this was over 15 years ago) someone tried to volunteer me to do a song, but I outright refused. Despite everyone’s attempts to egg me on, I withstood their attempts.

…seen a baby born? Yup. Four times. Each of my kids. I was there to welcome all of them into the world (after they’d gotten cleaned up, of course).

newborn

…had to get stitches? I’ve been through surgery before, so yes.

…stayed in pajamas all day? I try not to get out of my sleepwear on my days off, if I can, but usually it doesn’t work out. I think the last time I stayed in my sleeping clothes was when I got sick back in January (?).

…done a belly-flop off a diving board? Well, I really am not a swimmer, so I would never enter a pool via diving board. I tend to stay along the edge or the shallow end. I never really learned to swim—if I ever fell overboard in the ocean, I’d be fucked.

bellyflop

…found a wallet or money someone dropped? On a couple of occasions. Once was at a gas station on graveyard shift. A guy dropped three twenties on the floor in front of the register. I only noticed it when he’d long gone and I went to clean something. I put it in my till until the end of my shift. Dude never came back or called to claim it, so I ended up $60 richer. Then there was once at Costco that my kids (who were little at the time) found a small stack of money in the parking lot as we were leaving. They handed it to me, and we left (you think I’m gonna tell someone🤨). Down the road, I counted it, and it was only $66. I was honestly hoping there’d be a couple of hundreds in the pile, but it was all small stuff. But hey, I didn’t complain!

wallet

…talked your way out of getting in trouble? Um, no. I’m not a smooth talker, and I’m just bad at conversation in general. Probably why I never had a single date in my life, even with a couple of crushes I had in high school. I couldn’t talk my way out of a wet paper bag.

…won a contest and received a prize? I wish I could say I’d won big bucks on the slots, but I have won other things. One time, there was an ATV giveaway at a Pep Boys store, and I happened to win. Unfortunately, the thing never really got used and I think wound up either in a dump in Utah or still in my mom’s backyard. I really don’t remember.

…met a famous person or celebrity? I’ve talked with Larry the Cable Guy on Twitter once. Does that count? There was one time, while still living in Calfornia, that my dad took us to a shelter where we ultimately adopted one of their dogs. That particular day, there were a few people handing out autographs. One was Tom Hatten, the guy that recently died who appeared on Channel 5 in LA, drawing Popeye cartoons during the intermissions, and hosted the “Family Film Festival” back in the day. Also there was Bob Barker, and I got both of their autographs, but they were lost a short while later. At a concert in 1996, I managed somehow a backstage pass to meet the country band Diamond Rio. I had a couple of my CDs with me, which they all autographed, and I stuck the pass on one of the CD cases. Not sure where those things are now. Oh well. But yes, I have met, however quickly, a couple of celebrities. There are some that I would like to meet. One example is Frank Welker. He’s known better as Fred from Scooby-Doo and Megatron from Transformers.

welker


That’s going to do it for now. Some other time, I’ll do another one of these “have you ever” or “never have I ever” things. You might actually learn a thing or two about me through these! God knows I don’t usually volunteer info about me, unless I know you and am really comfortable with you🤯. And that’s just a small handful of people. Comment here or on Facebook or Instagram something else you might want to know about me. I might include it in a future post🤷‍♂️.

Until we meet again next Sunday, please be safe and be well.

 

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