C – Oh, bother!

When I resurrected this blog nearly two years ago, I honestly never thought I’d get to this point. One hundred posts seemed so far away. I thought around the twentieth or so, people would stop reading and I’d be writing to no one. But people kept reading. Sometimes, probably through the WordPress app, my blog gets viewed from other countries. People kept enjoying what I had to say; some laughed. Some got pissed. Others just agree to disagree. When I hit number 50, I was amazed at myself and the actual dedication I was putting into this. There were moments that I was rushed at the last minute to slap something together. Other times I’d be a little ahead. Some weeks it felt like a chore and really didn’t feel up to it. Most of the time, though, I found something to write about.

I started simply with angry rants about this and that. I added in a few posts about me. Now, I’ll be including other stories, sometimes personal. I’m not abandoning the angry rants. I’m just opening up, adding some positivity and trying to expand things. One can only be angry about so much for so long without sounding redundant or like you suffer from verbal diarrhea.

To even my own surprise, I’ve reached my 100th post. To celebrate this milestone, similarly to the 50th, I’m going down the alphabet, but this time, writing about things that really annoy me, frustrate the hell out of me, or I just downright hate🤬. Some may already be known, others…not so much. You might even share my feelings on some of these things. As a heads-up, you’ll need extra time this week to read everything. This post is roughly three times what I normally write. I usually keep myself to around 1000 words, but the word counter at the bottom of my screen clocks this post in at over 3000 words😮. Without further ado, let’s dive into this. We start at the beginning of the alphabet, so the first nuisance on this list begins, obviously, with the letter A:


American “cheese”. You knew this one had to be here, didn’t you? Of course, it’s absolutely not a secret. Its texture is weird, it melts unnaturally, and when heated, smells like rank, stinky ass. If you have a selection of cheese to choose from why on god’s green earth would you willingly choose this shit🤮?

American singles
An abomination pretending to be cheese

“Burger King mentality”. Burger King’s slogan for years was “have it your way”. Unfortunately, people think they can get whatever they want, whenever they want, the way they want it. Guess what, cousin? It don’t always work that way. Sometimes things don’t go your way, or you have to wait for your reward. Sucks, don’t it? Well you’ll get over it.

bk silly

Censorship. Why is most foul language censored in the media? You hear everything in the world around you, so why do we pretend it doesn’t exist on television? It seems American media wants to bleep out anything that could remotely offend someone, while in other countries, the only thing bleeped out is the dreaded “F word”. Hell, even that terrible “C word” is broadcast in some countries.

censorship
Censored face emoji. Why is foul language still bleeped?

Disneyland. Why does the “Happiest Place on Earth” earn a spot here? Because it’s the farthest thing from happy, in my opinion and the opinion of many others. It’s overcrowded, overpriced and overrated. I haven’t been there since the 1980s, and don’t really care to ever go again. Just parking is like $25; one adult ticket is upwards of $200 now (in 1985, admission was a paltry $17.95 [$42.87 today] and in 1990, it was a whopping $25.50 [$50.14 in 2020]); and the food/souvenirs inside the park are astronomically-priced. Some of the rides have hours-long wait times to get on. There are cranky, screaming kids around every corner. Even with a small family, one can easily spend more than $1,000 in one day at the Magic Kingdom. Honestly, the only magic happening there is making lots of money disappear from your wallet🧙‍♂️.

Disney prices 1975
Disneyland admission in 1975; in 2020, it’s upward of $200 each

Education. Why does this irk me? It’s not getting an education, but the way kids are taught in school, especially with that Common Core bullcrap they’re polluting our kids with. It’s not enough now to just figure out a math problem, but now they want to know why it’s this way and why it makes us feel a certain way to do it. I don’t get it, and I honestly think Common Core is just another way to dumb American youth down.

common core math crap
How in the fuck is anyone supposed to learn Common Core? It’s roundabout and fucking complicated
You gotta get drunk to understand common core!
About the only way to really grasp the concept of common core math is to be drunk prior to attempting!

Florida. It might have some nice beaches and be home of Walt Disney World, but whenever you hear some dumb or just plain weird news story, there’s almost a 100% chance that it originated from Florida. All sorts of weird shit happens in Florida. Is it the humidity? Is it because it just sticks out there like a hurricane magnet? Is it the swamps and gators? You might remember the whole presidential election debacle from 2000. Because of Florida, we almost were stuck with Al Gore as president. Not that the elected winner was great, but I think Bush was probably the lesser of two evils.

Cut Florida

Gas prices. If I were in California, I’d really be pissed about it, paying on average $1.00/gallon more than everywhere else. During April-May 2020, gas locally in southern Utah got as low as $1.699, while in California, their average finally saw under $3 ($2.966). No one like seeing prices go up, and it seems like every little thing that happens causes an increase. Perhaps the government is somehow controlling the weather and other factors to make those prices go up, and end up greasing someone’s palms? Admittedly, I can be a little bit of a conspiracy theorist.

racing fuel pump price
Fuel prices go up and down. Want some $10/gallon racing fuel?

Healthcare. I’m not at all a fan of Obamacare, but I also think that the American healthcare system needs a major overhaul. Everything medical-related is so exorbitantly expensive that it makes me not want to get sick. Doctor/dentist visits are outrageous, hospitals are pricier than the Ritz-Carlton and prescription drug prices are astronomical. When a drug to help someone with a rare disease costs thousands of dollars per dose, you know someone is getting raped, and the only one enjoying it is the drug companies.

expensive drug
Zolgensma, a gene-therapy drug, runs an astounding $2.1 MILLION per dose

Illegal Immigration. I have no problem with people who want to immigrate to this country, so long as they do it legally, jumping through the hoops and following the proper steps. The ones I have issue with are the ones who enter this country illegally, especially under the pretense of doing so to obtain the social benefits of food stamps and the like. I also greatly dislike these people who come illegally, then have a kid, so that the kid is a citizen, and thereby gain whatever benefit they can. The Constitutional amendment about “birthright citizenship” is antiquated and should be repealed. I won’t go into much more than that on this subject for now. That’s a discussion for another day.

uscis logo
Logo of the USCIS, formerly known as Immigration & Naturalization Service

Jackasses that come last minute. Anyone who works with the public can attest that these are some of the most annoying, self-righteous jerks that exist. Those people who, when a restaurant closes at 22:00, decide to pop in with their group at 21:59, and expect to be happily greeted, seated and given the absolute best food, like it was two minutes after opening. Let me tell you, no one is happy to see you. Yes, we have to serve you, but we’re pissed off about it. And, your food is going to be crap. The sides were prepared hours ago and everyone is ready to go home after their shift. Now, they’re going to end up being there

Ku Klux Klan. Along with every other group, regardless of their race, that think that one particular group, race or color of people is superior to another. Newsflash: no one is superior to another. Every race, religion, nationality, etc., has good people and bad people. There are good cops and bad cops. It’s sad that because of a few bad apples, everyone else that shares the same ethnicity, job, sexuality, or whatever, are all lumped together and all treated like shit. Some have been treated like shit for much longer than others. Last I checked, we’re all human beings and deserve to be treated with respect. Okay, except for the racist fucks killing innocent people. They don’t deserve anything, except maybe to have a large, cumbersome object shoved up their racist assholes🤬. George Carlin once summed this up best in the following video clip:

Left lane “campers”. You see them on the road daily—those people who never got a clue in drivers’ education that the left lane is a passing lane, and that remaining traffic should stay on the right. However, these entitled assholes think it’s their birthright to remain in the left lane no matter what, forcing people to either line up behind them, some of them honking incessantly, or to pass that cretin on the right.

keep right

Money. I add this not because I dislike money—au contraire, I like having cash in my pocket and a positive bank balance. The thing about money that bothers me is that seemingly everything in modern society revolves around it. You have to have money to acquire just about anything, and businesses are all about their bottom line, profits and the almighty dollar. Workers be damned, so long as we’re making an exorbitant profit and the CEO gets a very handsome bonus.

Narcissism. It’s good to have pride in yourself or self-esteem, but to think you’re God’s gift to everyone else is just going way overboard. Besides, no one wants to hear the endless tales of a self-inflated braggart. You simply have to go see Donald Trump’s personal Twitter profile. If his ego were any bigger, his head wouldn’t be able to fit in the Oval Office (kinda reminds me of the Airheads candy commercials).

Oddly creepy music. When most people think of Neil Diamond, they think of bar music, and two words of his song “Sweet Caroline”. You know, 🎶Sweet Caroline, dun dun dun🎶. But would anyone think of Neil Diamond as possibly a pedophile? Well, in an interview with him, a reporter asked about the inspiration for “Sweet Caroline”. He said it was President Kennedy’s daughter, Caroline. Well, if you think that she was born in 1958, and that song was released in 1969. Then, think about the words of the song, like “touching me, touching you”. For heaven’s sake, the girl was 11 when the song came out. Was he really fantasizing about an 11-year-old girl?! If so, he is one sick fuck🤢. Good thing I’m not a Neil Diamond fan. His music isn’t even really all that, anyway.

sweet caroline
Neil Diamond’s “Sweet Caroline” is about Caroline Kennedy. He said it was her innocence at 9 that inspired him. Uh-huh. Mmm-kay.

Politicians. Of course politicians piss me off. These useless career politicians are in office strictly for their own power and enrichment, not to be their constituents’ servant, as they’re supposed to. Government is supposed to fear the people, not the other way around. Things are somewhat backward today. The government of the people and by the people sure as hell ain’t for the people anymore.

Quarantines. With the whole bullshit episode of the coronavirus, entire states underwent quarantine, or stay-at-home orders. A few states resisted, but those states’ governors were the targets of much persecution from people who believed that everyone should be required to stay cooped up in their houses. Wearing gloves and masks, spraying this, sanitizing that, wiping everything down, eliminating everything self-service were just a few steps people were taking to supposedly reduce the spreading of a virus. As of the day I wrote this, all but I think nine states were locked down. Where does all the madness end?

Religious proselytizers. I have nothing personally against people of different religions. Anyone who wishes to study their scriptures and worship their gods can do so however they desire. Just please don’t come knocking on my door to try to convert me to your religion. I may not be visiting a certain church building on Sundays, but I have my own beliefs, and I’m set in my way. Coming to my door will just be a waste of your time.

Stupidity. I have really no tolerance for stupid bullshit. It is said that you really don’t know the level of stupid that really exists in the world until you work in a restaurant (fast food to high end) or retail. Holy shit, there are a lot of ignorant, stupid and dumb-ass motherfuckers out there.

double facepalm

Telemarketers and the like. This is a group of annoying people. Telemarketers, robocalls, bill collectors and other people who call you incessantly trying to get money out of you. Sometimes they’re legitimate, like (unfortunately) the collections calls, but they’re still annoying, nonetheless. Thank [insert name of whomever you thank here] that cell phones exist with caller ID and the ability to block countless phone numbers. It can make your phone a whole lot quieter. Cursed be the day in times past when you didn’t know who was calling, and you answered blindly😵.

Unforeseen circumstances. I get that unexpected things happen and plans sometimes change last-minute. I don’t necessarily hate that, but it is definitely annoying. I like to know what’s going on; I like to plan ahead for things. I hate going grocery shopping without a list, so I don’t end up buying a bunch of unnecessary or unneeded stuff. Sometimes work will ask me if I can pick up a shift or work some oddball time. If I only had one job, I’d pick that shit up in a minute. Working two jobs, it makes juggling things a bit more difficult. I would love extra hours and money, but I have to contemplate the toll on my body and whether I’ll have any downtime to rest or sleep in between.

Vice Laws. I always thought that it was silly that you had to be 18 to buy tobacco and 21 for alcohol, and that the ages should be the same. However, I never wanted to see the tobacco age go up. Now to buy smokes or vapes, you have to be 21, just like for booze. Okay, I get the idea and the sentiment behind it, but seriously, though. You can vote, enlist in the military, get tried for murder, or even perform in an adult movie at 18. An 18-year-old can think they’re helping decide their elected officials, they can die for their country, they can go be a porn star, but god forbid they drink or smoke. Nope, gotta wait until 21. This is seriously stupid.

no id no vice
Sign you might see at a retailer show-ing minimum tobacco/alcohol age

Well-done…anything. Not everything here is food related, but you know I had to toss in a couple. Granted, poultry needs to be cooked to a safe temperature, but no food should be so overly-cooked that it’s left a dry, leathery shell of what it once was, that has a texture resembling that of a tire tread. When even beef jerky is less chewy and has more flavor than your steak, you know that steak is way overcooked. A nice, rare to medium rare steak, juicy and full of flavor is the way to go. But, to each their own. You want your food burnt to a crisp🤢? You do you, boo.

Well done steak
Chef Ramsay’s opinion on well-done steak (that I happen to share)

X words, specifically the lack thereof. There are just so few words in English that begin with the letter X. Making lists like this become quite difficult when you get to the more-uncommon letters. There are hundreds of thousands of words in English, yet only 400 of them begin with X, and even less begin with Q (a paltry 294). Most of the time, in lists like this, people take a word beginning with EX (for example, excellence), and remove the E, since it has the X sound anyway. So, it just looks like a moron wrote it—“Xcellence”. Yeah, an atrocious and egregious misspelling, in my opinion.

Yellow journalism. The name might sound racist, but it’s essentially fake news with sensationalistic headlines and unresearched or unproven stories. A perfect example of this is the supermarket tabloids. “Rag mags” such as Globe, The Sun and National Enquirer are some of the tabloids you might see in the checkout lines. They always have some kind of bullshit on the cover, like “[so-and-so] on his deathbed” or “real reason [name of person] committed suicide”, using mostly photoshopped pictures and some half-truths blown out of proportion. Some morons swear by this overrated emergency toilet paper in magazine form. Anyone with half a brain and any shred of common sense knows that tabloids are full of shit. Unfortunately, people buy them, apparently in enough volume to keep the presses running😑.

tabloid

Zealots. In the area I live in, the people used to really act like religious zealots. You were either part of the predominant religion or you were looked down upon. I guess it’s still that way to a certain extent. I have no problem with people of any religion. The problem I have is the way some religions attempt to recruit and convert people over to their faith, as if it’s the right one and the be all and end all of life. It’s like they think everyone should live by the teachings, principles and philosophies of their group of worship, and that everyone else is a bunch of bad people who will be condemned to hell. If you’re happy with who and how you worship, more power to you. Just don’t force me to live by your principles or teachings.

If you made it clear to the end, congratulations🎉. You are to be rewarded for your diligence! I now close out the first one hundred posts of this wild little ride🎢 that is my blog. It is my sincere hope you will continue with me on this journey into the second hundred posts. As with life in general, no one knows where we’re going. At the end of Back to The Future 3, Doc Brown was asked about a fax from the future that later disappeared. He responded that neither their nor anyone else’s future had been written yet. The same is true for all of us. Our future lies ahead of all of us, so make it a good one.

Thank you again for following me and my random writings. Until we meet once again for the next installment, please everyone, be safe and be well.